Toggles Connection Newsletter
Trophies of His Grace
New Beginnings
—by Teresa
(From the Toggles Connection Newsletter)
I have finally gotten most of my holiday decorations put away this week. With the exception of a few stragglers (like my favorite candy dish that seems to hang around until February), the boxes are neatly stacked away until next year. We did manage to get the Christmas lights off the roof before spring this year, so, all things considered, we are ahead of schedule. (I won’t mention the cards that never got sent and are still sitting on my desk).
This morning I set about the yearly transfer of important dates from last years’ calendar to the new one I received as a gift. The new calendar is quite stunning with pictures of beautiful mountains reflecting a sense of peace for each month. The empty pages of the coming year seem almost like an empty canvas waiting to be filled by Monet.
The New Year begins again—time to start over with fresh calendars and new goals. I long ago gave up on writing down lists of goals that were impossible to accomplish. Three or four weeks into the year they were forgotten, so nowadays I just stick to the running list in my head.
I’m a little attached to my old calendar; after all, it has been with me for a whole year, and we are comfortable together. Inside its pages are written the vacations, the birthdays, anniversaries, and even the weather that came our way last year.
January was marked by snowstorms and the smiley faces my daughter drew each day school was cancelled because of the bad weather. Little clouds appear on several of the days; the gray gloomy days I thought would never end. February finds short notes written in anxiety after I found out that my mother-in-law had cancer. The day of her surgery is circled in red. Another month is noted by the death of our family dog, Bo. She grew up with my children, and when the two oldest left home she shared my loneliness. My life is laid out on these pages, yet something important is missing.
What do you remember about last year? What happened in your life? Is your calendar full of pain? Where have you acknowledged the joy? Or the thankfulness? As I thumbed through last years’ calendar I realized that not even once did I mention the blessings God sent me. I think I have spent so much time focusing on the abuse and recovery issues that I have neglected to notice the blessings in my life.
I know that sometimes it may seem difficult to find something to be thankful about when you are still dealing with so many painful issues. But, in my heart, I know that we should be thankful even for the MPD. I know many of you will think that is a strange thing to praise God about, but without the ability to dissociate many of us would probably not be alive today.
Our Heavenly Father knows us and loves us. Each part has served a purpose in our lives and helped us to survive. For that I am thankful. Maybe thankfulness and praise can be a beginning for all of us to have a closer walk with Jesus.
A new beginning starts for us each morning […] one more chance to praise Him.
“It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.”—Lamentations 3:22
